There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize