return my video game
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize
