It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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