oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
