Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
