You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
