How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
