You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
