summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
