saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
