Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
