THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
