i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
