I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
