Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
