Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
