The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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