wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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