that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
