The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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