so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize