went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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