I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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