you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize