Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
