so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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