Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize