After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
