I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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