I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize