You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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