And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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