so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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