Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
