things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Randomize
