He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
