google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
