exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize