you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize