it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
