We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
