they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
