Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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