I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
