direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
why do cheetos always look like penises
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
