I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
