I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
