Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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