I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
so let's talk penis.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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