it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
