So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I didn't notice because vodka
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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