i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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